So I spent the other day cheering my friend up. Usually I really can't write silliness. It's just something that's biologically against everything my brain and body accept as me. So, when he started to poke at me to broaden my horizons, and then threw one-liners at me...this happened.
I have, for some unknown reason, spent all morning editing this and making it readable.
Read on if you don't mind the silly.
Gon wandered through the old building. He didn’t particularly like the place, it felt...dark. It was the only way he could describe it. As he kicked a stray chunk of the crumbling wall down a seemingly neverending corridor, he was surprised to hear an oddly haunting voice. It was coming from a room he’d previously thought was empty. Hisoka had told him that the room was once used as a ‘withdrawing room’, and, when Gon had looked at him in confusion, had gone on to explain what that meant. The voice was beautiful, and Gon couldn’t resist checking it out; the ornate door handle turned with a click, as he pushed it open.
The first thing Gon noticed was Hisoka, frozen and apparently speechless, staring in bewilderment at...
Chrollo Lucilfer was straddling a huge wrecking ball, and swinging from one side of the room to the other. He was singing about loving someone and them not being allowed to say that he had just walked away...that he had come in like a wrecking ball...
“Hisoka,” Gon asked. “Why is Chrollo wearing a wedding dress?”
Killua had seen Gon disappearing through the door but had yet to see come out. They were currently in what he could only describe as a haunted mansion...with half of the Phantom Troupe. There was no way he was going to let Gon go anywhere alone.
Decision made, he chased after his best friend and pushed the door to the macabre room wide open. “Gon, what the hell...”
He felt the words disappear as the leader of the Phantom Troupe sailed past, back arching and bare shoulders sensually rolling as he sang. “All I wanted to do was break your walls” Killua’s mouth dropped open. “All you ever did was break me, yeah you wreck me.”
Gon was standing beside Hisoka. They were both staring, seemingly transfixed.
Deciding they could handle the situation perfectly fine by themselves, Killua backed out of the room as quietly as he could. Once he made it to the hallway, he sprinted for the safety of the mansions gardens and the wild forest beyond.
“Gon,” Kurapika said as he walked in through the open door. “I just saw Killua running down the corridor, and, have you seen Leori-” he started to ask but was cut short as Chrollo came swinging past in an exquisitely tailored wedding dress, singing at the top of his voice. “You know what, I’m just gonna come back later...”
Feitan was curious. He’d seen the kids walking up and down the hallway with various expressions of horror and shock on their faces. He knew the sound of his Danchou’s voice, and he also knew that it wasn’t like him to be as loud as this. Hands behind his back he wandered over to look in through the open door.
“No thanks,” he muttered and walked back the way he’d come.
Machi bumped into Feitan on the way to investigate the source of all the commotion. The small man pointedly avoided eye contact and muttered something about finding alcohol and an exorcist. Shaking her head, she found herself humming along to a familiar tune; but try as she might, she just couldn't place it.
The sight that greeted her as she reached the door was not one that she’d soon forget. After gaping at the sight of her Danchou making an exhibition of himself, and Gon and Hisoka just standing and watching, she marched up to the stunned Magician and slapped him across the face.
"Why are you just standing there you stupid clown?” she demanded. “You should be getting him down!"
Taken completely aback by the slap, Hisoka rubbed his jaw and looked in bewilderment between the swinging Troupe leader and the pink haired woman. "Just what do you expect me to be able to do?" he asked curiously.
Realising she wasn't going to get any help from either of them, Machi glared. Making up her mind, she sighed theatrically and stormed out, determined to find an actual loyal member of the Troupe to fix this.
When a distraught Machi had burst into the room, Nobunaga had been relaxing in with Franklin and Phinks. They’d all listened to her description of their clearly disturbed leader and of the way Hisoka was just letting it happen, but they didn't quite believe her. Phinks and Franklin had agreed to stay with the woman while he had volunteered to check it out.
That was how he found himself in a room, with some impressively large holes in its walls and his Danchou riding - and singing - on top of a god damned wrecking ball. He was even wearing a bloody wedding dress. What was worse, was that it appeared for all intents and purposes, that he was having the time of his life.
In the corner of the room, far from the trajectory of the ball, he spotted Hisoka and Gon. There were various clear spots on the floor where the two Hunters had been standing. They didn’t seem worried, in fact, Nobunaga noted with mild annoyance, they were both watching Chrollo’s progress around the room with a kind of morbid fascination.
“We need Uvo,” he muttered to himself and left them all to it.
It didn't take long for Nobunaga to return with the burley Troupe member in tow. He’d spent the entirety of the short walk to the withdrawing room laughing, but quickly stopped when he saw the situation for himself. His eyes widened in surprise. Thank you Nobunaga thought and stood aside to let his friend put an end to the madness.
Uvo let out an excited yell, "Oh HELL YEAH!! That looks like fun!"
What? Nobunaga thought, but before he could say anything Uvo had run straight for the wildly spinning ball. Silently Nobunaga slapped his palm to his face. He watched through his fingers as the large man, excited as a kid on Christmas, ran straight into the ball's path and used his Nen to protect him from the incoming damage. He caught it against his chest with an excited bark of laughter. Chrollo's back was to him, and he grinned down at the smaller man when he suddenly stopped singing.
"Mind if I get on?” he growled, face stretched into a wide grin.
When his boss made no sign of protest, Uvo lifted the man up and repositioned them both so that Uvo was sitting on the ball with Chrollo on his lap.
“Hey, Hisoka,” Uvo called. “Let’s get this thing going!”
Nobunaga watched as the Magician’s face split into a grin, and with a flick of his wrist, used his Bungee gum to start the wrecking ball swinging once again.
Nobunaga stared in shock as, once more, the room filled with the sound of Chrollo's masterful singing, and now, Uvo's wild laughter.
It was ten minutes later that the rest of the Troupe wandered in. Feitan had somehow found an entire crate of Sake and Phinks had a tray of glasses carefully balanced in his hand.
Without a word, Feitan offered an entire bottle to the shell shocked Samurai. Gon and Hisoka had wandered over to join him after Uvo had not so subtly pushed off from a wall and sent the ball spiralling in their direction.
“What’s that?” Gon asked curiously.
“Sake,” Feitan replied.
“Can I have some?” The young boy asked.
“Sure.” Feitan held another bottle out, but before Gon could grab it, Machi snatched it from the small man’s hand.
“He’s not even fifteen,” she scolded.
“So?” Feitan deadpanned.
Machi huffed and shook her head, taking the Sake for herself and stalking over to Phinks for a glass.
“You know,” Shizuku observed. “We should probably figure out what’s actually going on here.”
“Yeah,” Shalnark said, coming to stand by her side. “But in the morning. They both look so happy.”
“Besides,” Hisoka said gleefully. “I already set the security system to record an hour ago.”