2 years ago for day 51, 2019 with 401 words.


Commitment is hard. For me at least.

I naturally want to keep my options open. To be flexible, so I'm ready to respond to what happens tomorrow and not be tied down by what came yesterday.

Overall I think this can be healthy. In many ways the ability to minimise the things that tie you down can be positive. I guess that's the idea behind minimalism. Remove all the heavy weights around your neck that aren't worth their weight.

In other ways though, attempting to avoid commitment can be very negative.

Not committing to the woman in front of you because of who may walk round the corner tomorrow? Egotistical madness and a sure way to never thrive in a relationship.

Not committing to living somewhere for a set period of time? Now you've always got the variable of home and where you should be in the world. For most of us we can live anywhere, so the burden of continual opportunity cost weighs heavy.

Not committing to a job, but taking small contract/freelance roles to tide you over? Yet another near constant burden to run with, "what am I doing next?"

Commitment isn't always the answer. Certainly you shouldn't commit to a woman because she's the best you can see now. You should only commit if you love her, and want to continue to love her for as long as you both live.

Certainly committing to living some place isn't required. Nomadism is great and I aim to go back to travelling the world at some point.

And contracting and freelance work can be fantastic too. It's what I've done the past couple years and has had big upsides in flexibility and variety.

So what I'm not saying is you should just commit to stuff. Or that I should. I'm saying that we should be aware of the tradeoffs to commitment and to lack of commitment.

Commitment is a bold move. It says "I don't know what the future holds, but I'm here for this".

For me, as I seek to mature, I'm aware that keeping my options open, not looking to commit to what future Fred will do, can be a weakness for me. I'm seeking to deal with that intentionally and not let default Fred do as he will.

More and more, I'm committing.

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By Fred Rivett

Developer 👨‍💻 • Hobbyist designer 🎨 • Maker 🛠 • Runner 🏃‍♂️• Explorer 🌍

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