I had the money conversation with my boss today. He told me that the number I asked for is fair and he's happy with it. He wants to do the raise in three bumps and stretch it out, though, which I am fine with.
I am half holding off on the celebration still because I don't have anything in writing yet. Part of me is waiting for the other shoe to drop. I did not expect to get my ask so I am still half with my guard up. Maybe it's a misunderstanding? Maybe he didn't realise this is what I want in "just money" and not in "total compensation"?
We will see.
If the offer that comes in writing comes out different from what I expect, we'll negotiate. I am still super calm about that and don't feel like it is a bad thing anymore. I might negotiate one tiny detail anyway, depending on how the raise is structured.
But essentially, I got what I asked for.
Just like that.
Well, not just like that. I did a lot of work preparing for the meetings and we talked about my role and where it's headed for about five hours in total. Three last Thursday and another two today. The money conversation took just ten minutes.
I think that doing the groundwork and looking at the full picture of what my job entails helped a great deal. For the first time, everything is visible. It helped both me and my boss appreciate the sheer number of things I am responsible for. It also helped us see where things are still murky and need better boundaries.
I feel really good about both the conversations and the outcome. I am also glad I got there without pettiness, threats, and even comparison.
Ironically, it all started working out for me when I gave up my emotional attachment to the outcome. It's not that I didn't want the raise anymore, but still, I was alright with all possible outcomes. I went from "I really need this else I will not feel valuable" to "this is what I want so let's talk".
I think that helped keep me in a much more confident, matter of fact frame of mind and communicate better what I want and why.
I also think sending the number as a heads-up worked well. It wasn't a nasty surprise at the end of an amicable conversation. It was out there in the open from the beginning so my boss had time to do his own research and get used to the idea that that was my number.
Either way, I am happy!