Where do they all come from. All the lonely people, where do they all belong?
I always thought it was a weird song. What was it even about? Was it about pitying other people? What good can come of that? When you choose to distance yourself from empathy, what can you hope to learn from others?
I went to a bar tonight with a few coworkers. We were all women in Product, or so that's how it started. As we made our way into the subway and onward to The Village, the weather was almost perfect. Wearing my sweater and a light peacoat unfastened, I felt pretty comfortable.
I've noticed in groups, people tend to break off into pairs. I suppose it's why I prefer 1:1 conversations. Attempting to hold the attention of 2 or more other people is hard, let alone assuming I can do the same. Yet, I keep hanging out in larger groups, hoping to pair off with the right person.
But in a group of women, the loneliness inevitably seems to creep in. We are all successful women, intelligent, funny, talented, and beautiful in our ways. Suddenly she says it: "Maybe we should just date other women." I really thought it was the kind of thing you only see on television, that perhaps dating only seems bad, but in actuality, it doesn't play out like that in reality. Is it really worse than its ever been? Because of apps and the perpetuation of instant gratification? Because of the culture of our generation?
I don't know. I'm pretty sick of the narrative. So in an Italian Wine Bar and restaurant, I found myself ruminating about why things are this way, and why it feels like so many of us can't help but settle. I guess it's some sort of progress that I've nestled myself into this cocoon where I don't spiral into loneliness myself.